Tuesday 1 December 2015

Anxiety!!

Long time I was thinking about making this post and long time I was thinking about language I want use. Because there are things I wanna tell you and which I just don't know how properly write in english. My english skills aren't that good at all. But I said to myself "Let's try it"
I wanted to talk about something I was through in my life this year. Some thing that really affected me A LOT. I'm talking about some disease or idk how to call it. For this post let's call it ANXIETY.

It started after I became an employer in O2. First month was OK and everything was great. But then something happened. And I had just a big mental break down. I've started to have terrible thoughts. I was crying almost all days. Then I was whole weekend with my boyfriend and everything was fine again. For another week. They another break down. And then again. Next month I was again in Hradec with my bf and I must say that it was one of the most horrinble weekends I was through. Almost all the time I felt that anxiety. All I was feeling was just fear, helplessness, despair. I was lost in myself. One hour I was ok and they I cried for another two hours. Still repeatig "I don't know what to do with myself. I can't handle this feeling. I'm afraid I will feel like this forever. I don't believe that it may go away one day. I just can't live like this."